11.6.02

/McMoo/ but then last year the sermon like a week before christmas was like 'CHRISTMAS ISN'T ABOUT PRESENTS - OUR ONE TRUE PRESENT IS JESUS CHRIST!!!'
/McMoo/ my dad didn't even get my mom anything

/McMoo/ she was pissed.

28.5.02

Glad to see that Fay's started a Web site. Despite calling herself a blonde temp (Which, believe me, is not how I've ever thought of Fay - she's got too many fascinating aspects to her for those two things to ever really register), Fay [Sorry about the long sentence and parentheses - they are for a reason, the reason being that my head is in a blender after today] is a bloody good writer. So I'm happy.

22.5.02

6. Use the universal vowel sound as regularly as you can, even between words. Try to create a flowing whining noise as you speak, similar to that voice-over in the once popular children's TV show "Henry's Cat". Sentences with too many consonants can confuse the Sheppeyite into thinking he's listening to a drum beat or a scratch riff. He may then pop a pill and start raving: most inconvenient if you're trying to draw him into a discussion about the rights and wrongs of the Israel/ Palestine situation.

13.5.02

Stephen Byers: National Transport Secretary of Mystery
When Memepool said that Jesus liked nothing more than a righteous bud, I foolishly assumed that they meant the gnats' urine that Anheuser Busch sells as beer. Foolish me.
Now, what would Judas do?
Finally, NASA has found a conversational gambit for all those old timers from Big Iron houses who like to talk about back when Winchester disks ruled the Wild M4 Corridor and how they had to reset the heads on 12" platters by hand &c &c.


Well, now NASA needs your 8086es...

30.4.02

"Anderson, editor of "Seasoned Rogue" magazine, has written a sound manual for the modern day rake. The tips are first rate."
Havefunlooktidy!

16.4.02

Remember back to your childhood swing... then reach into your pocket to pay the license fee.
Bruce Schneier: " More and more, the general public is being asked to make security decisions, weigh security tradeoffs, and accept more intrusive security.
Unfortunately, the general public has no idea how to do this."

11.4.02

Now we know what RailTrack did with its old British Rail sandwiches.

10.4.02

Just what the Museum Curator ordered.

1.4.02

A nice April Fools' from the Register.

29.3.02

What would you do with all those redundant nuclear attack subs that are kicking around these days?
Well, if you're the Kentucky Legislature, you might consider using them to sink casinos in the Ohio river.
No, they're serious.

22.3.02

David Coursey's lastest column on ZDNet. Looks like he's converted - to the point of being slightly embarassing to fellow Mac users. Come on, it's only a bloody computer!
Toynbee ideas in Kubrick's 2001 resurrect dead on planet Jupiter. Eh?

21.3.02

One reason why nationa ID cards and magnetic stripped drivers licenses are a really bad thing to introduce into the UK.

20.3.02

Blimey. I've just been offered a job as features ed on a sailing magazine. I've only gone and accepted it, too. Crikey! Feeling a bit shellshocked. But must snap out of it; have feature to rewrite before tomorrow....

19.3.02

Trying to configure Sendmail as a long time Mac user makes me feel like an aomeba eating a peach - I know it's big, I just have no idea how big. or whether it'll tip over and crush me.
And this from someone who first used pmail to send email across JANET. Amazing how quickly you forget, isn't it? Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and wrestle with Pico...
Chris wrote a nice piece on Publish On Demand in the grauniad...
Stink different...
"We were working on a way to make an aquarium with the bong inside it so that the person taking the hit could watch the fish," Agapornis explained, "but the aquarium took up too much room."

Don't try this at home, kids.

15.3.02

13.3.02

Some stunning pics of the WTC memorial in New York.
Oh no! StimpSoft™ is gone. I'll miss all that wonderful software...

10.3.02

Holy Cow! William Shatner has a Weblog!
I thought I'd taken LSD by mistake, but then anyone who has listened to Shatner's version of Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds occasionally has a really bad flashback.

6.3.02

This one registered about eleven on the weird-stuff-o-meter. Charles in a loincloth? Surely not...

5.3.02

The New York Times takes a look at those not-so-old new tech magazines.
Why did Industry Standard have to pop it's clogs when Red Herring survived? I couldn't help feeling slightly greased when reading the Herring...

3.3.02

Michael Wolff's column has some interesting things to say this week about business reporting. Thank god someone has had the nuts to stand up and talk about it.

2.3.02

Alas, poor Ibis Cycles. Chapter 7 bankruptcy sounds painful. I'm sure Chuck Ibis will return, but in the meantime, another excellent small framebuilder bites the dust.
I once got to ride a Bow Ti for a bit. back then, 5" of rear wheel travel was unheard of on XC bikes. I couldn't twist the frame, and I would have killed to own one. But nearly four grand for a frame only is a hell of a lot of cash...
They say the camera adds several pounds. In my case it looks like it added about 50. More (hopefully flattering) pics as and when they're developed.
Ahhh. Back home after a wonderful week in Spain - 150 miles or thereabouts, according to the speedo, and we also managed to squeeze in a visit to the Alhambra in Granada on our rest day.
The Alhambra is stunning - definitely one for a visit. The bit I went to see was the water staircase, but this paled into insignificance compared to the rest of the site.
Oh, and the palace is pretty cool if you're a maths geek, as well.

22.2.02

Global Double Crossing - learn the joy of Chapter 11!
Flash can be awful, but this is excellent. Enjoy the leaders of the Free World. Thanks Rachel!
Salsatastic!

21.2.02

I like Chomsky. Especially his noam.
Arf.
The horrors of feature writing at 12.41 am GMT. Give me caffeine. Now.

19.2.02

This has been about for a few days now, but it's worth a link; Cringely talks about why Apple should port OS X to Intel.
It's a lovely idea. I for one would buy a copy - purely because I can buy an Intel PC cheap, and I probably should get a desktop system to replace my Pismo. But this goes against Cringely's argument that X on Intel won't be a re-run of the old Apple clone wars.
Poor little Internet entrepreneur bride-to-be Kay Hammond. Jilted by the hoaxer who bought her at auction. I don't know whether to laugh or feel sorry for her. I think mostly the latter.
High noon for hackers: not quite the headline I was hoping for. ;)

18.2.02

Only the second issue, but Tachyon TV is starting to look like a much better version of Bizcotti....

15.2.02

An excellent Ars Technica on Microsoft's .Net plan. The problem with .Net (from a journalist's perspective) is that it's very, very big and covers a hell of a lot of areas. However, whilst the AT article describes what.Net does from a programmer's point of view, it doesn't really tackle what end users will see, or where MIcrosoft and its competitors are intending to go with services over the Web.

14.2.02

I always used to have a great deal of respect for professional sea workers; going sailing is just leisure, but they spend all their time on the water. Well, until now.

13.2.02

It's good to see that someone has written a hack to get Clarus The Dogcow back into her native environment. Moof!
Currently in development: a six legged walking digger type thing. Looks a bit silly, but that might be because it is only a concept at the moment. Looks like the bastard offspring of a JCB and a millipede!
Still nursing blisters from volunteering (along with Col and Caroline) to work on Forest Enterprise's new mountain bike trail at Cwmcarn over the weekend. Here's a short bit about the FE's coolest tool - a walking digger or three. The singletrack it cuts really is fantastic.

11.2.02

Give a senior exec a Palm and unsupervised access to a cooker, and this is what happens.
Jason at Dragon DH has written a fairly long piece about
why he's not going to offer British Cycling Federation points at his races this year.
The additional BCF levy seems to be more about milking money from the few bits of bike racing that are growing and currently attract a good turnout than about actually helping racers and organisers race.
The BCF seem to have justified the levy increase on the basis of insurance premiums increasing and because they want to send young racers abroad to race. That's a good thing, but they will be raising an additional £800 per day from each round of the Dragons; that's a lot more than 'young racers' like Ffion Jenkins got from the BCF last year. On top of that, the BCF is supposed to be raising cash from sponsorship and Lottery grants, not taxing cyclists.
Most race organisers run races as a small business; if they drop BCF points, then elite riders won't race, and up-and-comers won't want to race because they can't get points either. Jason is pretty much alone here, in that he does it because he thinks people probably like racing in the Welsh hills. He's right; the number of entrants has climbed, and it seems that plenty of talented riders couldn't care less about BCF points; if they can get to ride a challenging course and race against their friends, they'll do it.
The BCF seems more interested in winning internal political battles and paying for roadies to race abroad than it does about actual cycling. They really are an irrelevance for the majority of people who swing their legs over a bike.

7.2.02

If you're using Office v:X then you might want to go get a patch from here.
I only found out about it by chance - a bit worrying, that.

6.2.02

you might remember the 'Six degrees of Kevin Bacon' game from a way back. Well, Columbia University's Sociology department are trying to prove that everyone is six people from everyone else with the Small World Research Project.

5.2.02

Woohoo! Looks like Chip Rosenthal has won the case brought against him by a relatively young company for the domain he's owned for ten years. Never has the tired old cliche 'a victory for common sense' made so much, er, sense. Congratulations, Chip.

Update: That might not be the end of it. The company that owns the Unicom trademark can still appeal, and basically the suit seems to have been thrown out of the California legal system because Chip R lives in Austin. So Unicom Inc could still have a go in Texas. Looks like it wasn't thrown out because Unicom Inc seem to be trying to lean on a small guy, but because they filed in the wrong state. More from Chip's lawyer here.
Got hard drive troubles? Miss the Swedish Chef from the Muppets? Maybe you should get your motherdisc defraggled by the Datadocktor - din hjälp bland ettor o nollor!
An amusing take on cloning.
That said, generally tinkering with things beyond man's ken is always a little risky. And scary.
Larry Ellison has said that he wants to run Oracle to run on Intel/Linux servers - the firm has had three aging HP servers replaced with Linux and intends to have Linux throughout by the summer.
Perhaps more interesting was that Ellison claimed that clustering would lead to the death of the mainframe. He hasn't quite got us to Network Computer nirvana yet, so I'm not going to be taking a sledgehammer to that HP/UX box quite yet...
"An engineer would look at our communications system today--email, cell phones--and be horrified at all the security gaps and predict that the bad people would exploit those gaps on a massive scale and a huge market for crypto would spring out of it, but it hasn’t happened. Maybe it will."

3.2.02

Why not try Cheese Racing? Well, for a start, it's raining like stink here at the moment (possibly the wettest, coldest bike ride I've ever beenh on today). Secondly, there doesn't seem to be a strong cheddar cheese category. Hmmm. Oh, and you'll need a barbeque...

31.1.02

More on the Sklyarov case. Elcomsoft's lawyer in the US has filed for dismissal. It certainly looks like Adobe has lost the taste for persecuting Sklyarov.
What's your hobbit / dwarf / elf / human / orc name?
One of mine comes out as Frappi. Nice to named after an iced coffee beverage, y'know...


30.1.02

Oooh. Shiny toy! I want one of these.
A very innovative means of inputting text. i wouldn't be surprised if this made its way into mobile phones. i'm also surprised that Sony, with its Jog Dial, hasn't already got there. In the mean time, I'm very, very impressed. And searching for spare change down the back of the sofa...
Cool stuff underway in the People's Republic of China - reported by Politech. Nikkei is reporting that several DVD manufacturers in Japan are considering action against Chinese DVD manufacturers, who they say have ripped off technology. Surprising bearing in mind Japanese clone manufacturers' attitudes to making plug compatibles, as documented in Ferguson and Morris' seminal Computer Wars.
Anyway, the point put forward by Nathan Cochrane, a journalist from The Age, an Australian national paper, is that the Chinese players are popular, not least because they aren't as prescriptive as more regulated players from other markets.
I'll post a link to the actual Politech mail once it's archived on Politechbot.
Looks like Dot Com type Kay Hammond is actually going to
do the marriage thing with the winner of her auction last year. Looks like £251,000 can buy you love. or at least a pre-nuptial agreement.

29.1.02

Wow. Stunning horse / bonfire pic. Bit dubious about the idea of riding a horse through a bonfire, though. Slightly gruesome.
I forgot to link to a story about Amazon turning a profit. Silly me....

28.1.02

Whoa. Global Crossing has filed for bankruptcy protection. George Gilder might have to economise on his jogging shoe habit from now on.
Looks like the company has been bailed out at least in part by Hutchison Whampoa. Another company that is ...interesting. But they're doing some interesting stuff with 3G mobile in the UK at the moment - namely, holding a licence, and buying airtime from other providers. Which could be a smart idea.
Bidding for copies of the Enron Ethics manual is hotting up.

27.1.02

Prof. Roger Scruton. Visiting professor of philosophy at Birkbeck College, London. Columnist in many newspapers, and contributor to the Wall Street Journal, The Economist and the FT. Member of the panel of The Moral Maze, broadcast on radio Four. Oh, and he also seems to have been taking £4,500 a month from a Japanese tobacco company to pimp ciggies in his columns.

25.1.02

Only from Bungie, makers of Halo and Oni: Pimps at Sea.
Attention marketing personnel! Should you be applying for this job?

24.1.02

More Marmite fun (and flaky cod psychology) from the New York Times.
Looks like Enron's CEO has found himself a new job already. Well, according to SatireWire, anyway...
If someone were to nick your sister's computer, what would you do? In the case of this chap, who had a good knowledge of AppleScript, you use her Timbuktu install to find the computer in question and lojack it back from 'em.

23.1.02

Dan Gillmor has a good old look at what Netscape is hoping to achieve in its lawsuit against Microsoft.



Investment bank CSFB has been fined US$100 million by the NASD and the SEC for "taking millions of dollars from customers in inflated commissions in exchange for allocations of "hot" Initial Public Offerings (IPOs)." It is always interesting to see which banks are enthusing about particular stocks.
One for all you beer lovers out there. How close are you to your first love?
'ello Paul Rogers, how are you?
Many thanks to StimpSoft™ for the wonderful Frogslapper POP reader. Without this, the evil that is Tiscali would have prevented my missus from picking up her mail entriely. Now we know that Tiscali just don't care about their customers. The bastards.
Oh, and check out StimpSoft's Canadian site as well...

22.1.02

Reason Number 182 for not eating Nachos and cheese as your main evening meal:
I dreamt I was on a train to San Francisco with my old flatmate. We ended up in a railway carriage with Hunter S Thompson and a bunch of technology journalists I had either worked with or know socially. Thompson told me I was losing it. I fully understood this when we got to some sort of railway station (it looked like one from Theroux's Great Railway Bazaar) and I went to get my suit carrier. God knows why. It was one carriage along, but this part of the train was still moving. So I didn't pick up the suit carrier and left it on the train.
Then I got seperated from Jon and my girlfriend, who were over with Jon's parents (who live in Scotland) waiting for me to stop talking to the dot com CEO (I won't say who) who was now selling Mexican jumping beans in the station lobby.
I ended up wandering through a bit of SF I have no recollection of at all. There were plenty of biker gangs, but none of them had seen my bags and they were all very friendly and polite.
Then I found the missus, Jon and Jon's parents at a bike shop. It was a tiny shop - sort of like a bike shop I used to go to in Glasgow - in the front room of an Edwardian terraced house, sort of like the ones in Cardiff. Caroline was looking at a Hello kitty road bike in gloss white and pink. Even the Campag Helios wheels were white, with little kittens on the white gloss braking surface. That was pretty disturbing...
Enough. I'm going to stay of the cheese and salsa for a while.
Somone should tell Yahoo that it linked to the wrong media for this Adam Ant story. NTK already has, of course....

21.1.02

After nearly thirty years of development, it's good to see that industrial designers are completely capable of producing the most damn ugly designs to ever curse your desktop.
The Groom Lake, in particular, looks like the bastard son of a DSLAM, a Mac G3 desktop and a 50's kitchen utensil.
Looks like Orange are having a few problems with production at the moment. Michael Bonney has explained why in a very frank and honest manner - which is cool.
What he has done fits in very well with the Cluetrain Manifesto. And possibly with the Gluetrain Manifesto as well...


17.1.02

My eMate has turned up - after a monstering from ParcelForce - and I promptly started a kernel panic on my PowerBook by trying to network the two together with IRda. Doh!
Never mind. Much config fun. Damn, it's a cool toy...

16.1.02

Well, well, well. Looks like David Coursey has decided to give the Mac another whirl after his criticism of the new iMac. I get the feeling he'll probably enjoy a month of Macness, but he'll want to go back to the PC at the end of it.
Two words: Samba and Fire, the best, if not the only multi-protocol chat client for the Mac. It does AIM, MSN, Yahoo, Jabber, IRC and ICQ all in one handy package.

Yay! Bike mag is publishing Ferrentino's column online. He always was one of the best reasons for buying the mag...

15.1.02

The New York Times* on all that Time / iMac bother. Did Time sell out? NYT doesn't seem too convinced.

*You'll need to fill in a free subscription form - which is a pain.

14.1.02

Which pre-1985 video game character are you?
Many thanks to George Bush, who sent in this lovely animation. George should be very proud. He used his crayons under adult supervision, of course.

12.1.02

Interesting take on Common Language Runtime at Slashdot. CLR is already pretty damn important in terms of .Net and Sun ONE. Talk to Sun, and they'll say some pretty unsavoury things about CLR.
On the one hand, .Net is pretty open, and on the other, it's a good way for Microsoft to build toll booths. The other thing is that Sun is out to protect Java any way it can. And somewhere in the middle are all those who aren't fussed, but want to be able to use something that isn't platform dependent. It's gonna be a biggie, kids...

10.1.02

Blimey - Spatula City still exists! Of course, I had to go and press the Big Red Button That Doesn't Do Anything. Ah, how I long for those days of Radiohead, bad haircuts, riding five days in a row because it was reading week and greasy spoon breakfasts at Ramon's in Cathays...
David Coursey takes a swing at Apple's new iMac on ZDNet. His argument is basically that it'll never work because you can't get access to multiple FireWire and USB ports (Er, check the back of it, Dave) and flat panels never were popular with consumers anyway. The last is a good point; as he points out, flat panels haven't been popular on desktop PCs recently, not least because of the extra expense. This will change - viz the extraordinay growth in laptop sales. It's also worth noting that PC sales have slumped across the industry, which might partially explain slow sales.
That said, NEC|Mitsubshi in the UK says it's monitor sales comprised of around 70% flat panel LCDs last year. Admittedly, they concentrate on the mid-to-high end of the market, but it's still an interesting number.
Various panel manufacturers went out to grab LCD land last year, dropping prices to the point that manufacturers couldn't resist. They're now putting prices back up. LCDs are awful for anything that needs colour consistency - page layout, image manipulation and video postproduction are examples - but if they (and OLEDs, the next big thing) get cheap enough, then they will replace CRTs in many cases. I'm writing this on a laptop with a 14" TFT, and the big old 20" AppleVision to my right is switched off and dormant.
The second part of Coursey's article attacks Apple for squeezing the press. Basically, they gave an exclusive to Time (owned by AOL/Time/Warner) and told others (including Mr Coursey) that no-one had been pre-briefed.
Coursey is right to be miffed at Apple for what they pulled, but he's getting back at them in a very personal way, and he's using the iMac as a rather obvious little brother to beat up.
I don't like what Apple has done with it's launches. I thought the hype was excessive - and disappointment inevitable. I thought the iMac ugly - although it moves better than it looks, and I'm tempted to reconsider. It's still very expensive, and I'm glad they're hanging onto the old CRT iMacs at lower prices.
At the end of the day, Coursey's article says more about how he goes about getting news and exclusives than it does about Apple.

9.1.02

A review on kuro5hin.org of iPhoto and iTunes. A pretty good look at the two of 'em.
I've had a couple of days after the keynote to think this all over, and try out iPhoto. I'm using a Pismo PowerBook, so OS X can be slow - visually - but no slower than SuSE PPC running KDE. iPhoto is a good example of this, although I must admit to being pretty impressed at how quickly iPhoto can scroll through the 300 - odd pics I've imported into it. That said, add titles or film scroll numbers, and it quickly slows down.
{sniff} Ever long for the good old days of late '93, when Spatula City was a famous site and stuff like Cycling.org was still up and churning out mail groups? The Internet Pizza Server has been churning out something good for your nerve endings since 1994 and has had over a million visitors. Good to see they've (mostly) stuck to the cause with ASCII and good 'old cheesy gifs. Ah, nostalgia. It's not what it used to be.
Just posted to Politech: Save Unicom.Com. Don't you just hate it when someone with lawyers and no right to use them (or scissors - without adult supervision) gets all enthusiastic?

7.1.02

"I bring this all up because now Microsoft has a new version out, Windows XP, which according to everybody is the ``most reliable Windows ever.'' To me, this is like saying that asparagus is ``the most articulate vegetable ever.''
Is it me, or is the new iMac rather, er, ugly?
According to the lead story in Time Canada (now removed) Jobs will introduce iPhoto as well.
Hmm.
Find out in a couple of hours...

6.1.02

Well, Epson have lost another customer. Apart from telling OS X users to 'buy another Epson printer that's supported,' they have continued to go slow or not support printers.
Lucky, some enterprising bods have noticed that you can hack up some servicable drivers. Good for them.
Sorry Epson, you just lost me as a customer. If it takes a couple of bods a few hours to write a decent driver for one of you printers without support, it surely wouldn't take that long for your engineers to knock one up. And it would keep us Mac users happy...


"Though unarguably catchy, its meaning is somewhat unclear; fundamentally, however, it appears to be extolling the companionship of yeast."

5.1.02

More from Rachel: Lambs On Line. They all rock - nothing like the Lean Muscular Sheep we saw stranded in fields with little to eat during the F&M crisis this year.
You too can look like Kenny Rogers
Rah Rah for Apple and their hype wagon. We're going to find out what they're all so pumped up abouton Monday. But in the mean time, Dave Winer has an interesting viewpoint on what will be announced. Basically a tablet-ish sort of device that will allow you to take a light, thin computing device around the house with you.
A few problems, however: 802.11a, a wireless networking standard offering 54Mbps over 802.11b's 11Mbps has not been approved in Europe. Offer 'a' and you're ruling out Europe. Offer 'b', and people will complain they're being ripped off (Especially in the US, where 'a' has been happily cleared by the FCC and is about to debut.)
Secondly, 3Com launched and then ditched the Audrey, a similar device.
Okay, 3Com didn't do it properly, but other things, such as a relatively high price, put paid to it. If Apple are going to launch an iDock, it'd better be cheap as hell.



This Squirrel Can Eat Your House. Er...

4.1.02

"I don't imagine many 2.5' pigs being able to protest much to the Lord of the Sith." Worthy - I always did wonder what on earth the elephant in the bar in Star Wars was all about. Well now I know...
Prawnzilla Vs Citrus Sheep I especially like the courgettes. Thanks Rachel!

2.1.02

This made me laugh (and get a bit worried). "Now, he could have been a girl, but he lacked the necessary equipment; a functional brain and dignity."
I haven't been able to play with this yet, as the site has been swamped. But if you want to cruise through census figures from England in 1901, go here.

1.1.02

Happy New Year! The SO and I lasted until 4.30am at a party in Brighton hosted by all round nice chaps Chris and Stuart, and finally climbed back into the car to travel back home at 2.30pm today. At the moment my brain hurts. Bring on the Gumby brain surgeons...